Dale's Cancer Blog: Quarterly Check-Up (2005-06-15)

Last week I had my quarterly checkup. Same tests as before, CT scan, x-ray, blood tests. Results were good ... no new masses or evidence found of recurrent/metastatic cancer. Next checkup is for October 2005.

My Cancer Survivor Story - "Never Give Up Hope"

My name is Dale. I am a survivor of a rare type of cancer called “intrahepatic cholangiocarcinoma”, which is bile duct cancer in the liver, and is also a form of primary liver cancer. This is my story.

I became a cancer survivor on 5/25/04. That was the day I awoke from a 6-hour major surgery in which 75% of my liver was removed. I had an operation called a liver resection. A 2-inch diameter malignant tumor was cut out of my liver. I had Stage-II bile duct cancer in the liver. The cause was a rare form of cancer that begins in the bile ducts, called intrahepatic cholangiocarcinoma, a form of primary liver cancer. Following surgery I had six weeks of chemo and radiation. I was out of work for three months. I was 46 years old. It was a summer I will never forget.

My doctors and surgeons at M.D. Anderson could not determine just how I got cancer. I had no previous symptoms or risk factors to indicate I even had cancer, only abnormal blood results. Bile duct cancer is usually not detected early. I was fortunate in that mine was. By the time one is in pain, or the cancer has spread to other organs, it can become Stage III or IV. By then the prognosis for bile duct cancer is extremely poor. The only possible chance may be a liver transplant. The doctors said if I would have waited a few more months that might have been the case with me.

My primary doctor and a very good friend of mine at M.D. Anderson are two big reasons why I am still here today. During a routine annual check-up in January 2004, my doctor noted abnormal blood results. Something was wrong with my liver. He seemed more concerned than I was. He kept insisting on different tests to determine why. At the time I felt normal, had no pain, no reason to think I had cancer. I was in no hurry, but continued with other tests. Then four months later, an MRI noted a 2-inch diameter mass in my liver. Only then did I start to get somewhat concerned. I called my good friend at M.D. Anderson. She told me 10 words that may have saved my life – “get your butt in here as soon as you can!” I went to M.D. Anderson in Houston on 5/5/04 for tests. Two days later on 5/7/04 I was told I had cancer, specifically intrahepatic cholangiocarcinoma. Surgery was my only chance of a cure. It was not a difficult decision to make. I immediately told the surgeon “let’s do the operation.” More tests including a biopsy were done, and less than three weeks later I had surgery at M.D. Anderson.

Family and friends played a big part in my support and recovery. Without my family I would have never made it. My brothers took me for various tests and stayed with me during my initial recovery at home after surgery. My Mom and Dad literally moved in with me for two months while I continued my recovery at home after surgery. Sadly, exactly one year to the day I first went to M.D. Anderson, my Mom was diagnosed with Stage-IV bone cancer. The day was 5/5/05. May 5th will now be a difficult day I will always remember. My Mom passed away from cancer on 8/5/05. It was three days before my birthday. Her courage and determination during those last months are a continuous source of inspiration to me. In early 2006, another good friend/co-worker of mine was also instrumental in strengthening my faith. Through our talks she planted a seed that made me think about God and life in a different way. I think all these events are connected – my cancer, family, friends – and I believe everything has a purpose.

When one is first told they have cancer, their life is forever changed. Cancer has a way of doing that to you. But for me, I was never angry or resentful I got cancer. I never asked “why me?” Attitude and patience are very important in coping with cancer. The thought of dying never entered my mind. I was prepared for a long journey. I remained positive and approached cancer as just another challenge in my life. But I was not going to let it defeat me. And now in time, I’ve come to fully accept it as a part of my life.

But cancer is not pretty. It destroys lives and families. I’ve heard people call it a beast. At times it is an emotional roller coaster. It is also unfortunate that everyone does not survive cancer. And even if you are able to survive, you can never be “cured”. Once you’ve had cancer there is always a chance of recurrence. You will have continuous check-ups and tests. And although the longer you survive, the odds get “better” the cancer will not return, the doctor visits and waiting for the results don’t necessarily get easier. Each visit the thought is still in your mind the cancer could return. As a survivor your hope is to live the remainder of your life in remission and that the cancer does not come back. But with hope there is always a future. And as a survivor I never give up hope.

As I reflect, unless you’re a cancer survivor it may be hard to comprehend. But oddly I’m realizing now that getting and surviving cancer has been somewhat a blessing to me. And the longer I survive, the more I am seeing all the “good” that has come to me as a result of my cancer. So much has been a positive change in me both spiritually and in my outlook to life.

Cancer survivors have two lives, before and after cancer. I read a book by Lance Armstrong, who overcame testicular cancer and was a seven-time Tour de France winner. When Armstrong was undergoing chemo, another cancer patient sent him a letter saying, “You don’t know it yet, but we’re the lucky ones.” Meaning that those who get cancer and the transformation they go through truly know what life is, how to live it, and how important it is. Having experienced cancer myself, I couldn’t agree more with that statement. And I can honestly say I prefer my life after cancer.

One’s faith is also tested with cancer. I believe one has to experience and suffer hardships before one can fully understand and recognize just why tragedies occur in life. But for those that can learn from their trials and misfortunes, one can grow and become a much stronger person. I know for myself I look at life differently now. I have gained a greater appreciation for everything I do. I made it through cancer, so I can face any challenge that comes along. I can sincerely say cancer has made me a better person and for that I am truly thankful.

Strange, sometimes I do wonder why I am still here today. Why did I survive while others with cancer do not? A nurse at M.D. Anderson once told me I’ve been given a second chance in life, and I should use it wisely. Perhaps God has more things in store for me. I don’t know what lies ahead in my future. But I am looking forward to it and all it has to offer. I thank the Lord everyday now for all He has done in my survival journey. And as I continue to survive, my wish now is through my stories and personal involvement I can offer encouragement and inspiration to others. Not only to those affected by cancer but anyone having to deal with a crisis or issues in their life. And to never give up hope or in one’s dreams.

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Saturday, August 30, 2008

Quarterly Check-Up (2005-06-15)

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My Cancer Survivor Story - "Never Give Up Hope"